Too Much Rules Will Kill You

Apa yang dilakukan seorang pria begitu sampai di rumah sepulang dari bekerja atau kuliah? Gambaran umum dari hampir semua pria yang saya kenal adalah: membuka sepatu, jaket, tas dan semua hal ribet yang menempel di badan (selain baju dan celana), terus duduk selonjor di sofa atau kursi malas. Dimana meletakkan barang-barang tadi, itu urusan belakangan. Yang penting bebas dulu.
Sementara sang istri atau ibu kemungkinan besar akan ngomel panjang pendek
“Sepatu simpen yang rapi di rak! Kunci mobil tuh jangan sembarangan taronya! Tas kamu simpen di ruang kerja! Jaket sama kaos kaki jangan lupa masukin tempat baju kotor!”
Dan lain sebagainya, yang kemudian cuma akan dijawab
“Iya, ntar dulu.”
Tapi ternyata jawaban asal jadi itu tidak memutuskan semangat para wanita itu untuk terus menteror kaum pria yang baru pulang dengan omelan lanjutan
“Kalo baru pulang tuh buka sepatu sama kaos kaki, simpen di tempat yg bener, trus kamu cuci kaki & tangan. Bukannya malah selonjoran di sofa kayak gitu. Mandi dulu gih, badan kamu pasti kotor dan bau dari luar. Abis itu kamu makan malem... ... ...”
Oh my god, please deh! Mungkin itu yang akan diucapkan oleh anak anak ABG jaman sekarang. Kebanyakan aturan banget sih. Memangnya kalau santai santai dulu sebentar ngga boleh ya?
Kuantitas peraturan yang tidak boleh dilanggar akan menjadi sangat banyak begitu menyentuh masalah fashion. “Kalau pake kemeja ini, harus pake dasi yang seperti ini.” atau “Sepatu kamu ngga boleh yang seperti itu kalau datang ke acara anu.” Padahal, tahukah anda bahwa kebanyakan laki-laki hanya ingin pakai baju kaos, celana pendek dan sandal? Karena orientasi kita adalah kenyamanan pada waktu dipakai, bukan gaya. Salah satu bos saya hanya mau pakai baju kaos, celana jeans dan sepatu kets setiap hari kalau berangkat ke kantor. Dengan rambutnya gondrong yang jarang disisir dan gaya-nya yang seperti anak metal, tidak akan ada yang menyangka bahwa dia adalah salah satu pengambil keputusan penting di perusahaan itu. Sering sekali tamu yang datang untuk bertemu dengannya menganggap resepsionis kami bercanda pada waktu ditunjukkan bos saya sebagai orang yang akan ditemui. Kalau hal itu diceritakan pada sang bos, dia cuma komentar “Gila ya orang jaman sekarang, lihatnya cuma dari penampilan doang.”
Peraturan paling aneh bagi kami kaum laki-laki adalah tidur harus memakai piyama dan penggunaan jas mandi. Setidaknya hal itu menurut saya dan teman-teman saya. Karena bagi kami pakaian yang paling cocok untuk tidur adalah baju kaos dan celana pendek atau boxer. Semakin jelek atau belel baju yang dipakai, itu semakin nyaman, tidak peduli di beberapa bagian sudah robek dan tidak enak dilihat. Sedangkan jubah mandi, sampai saat ini saya tidak melihat keunggulannya dibanding selembar handuk lebar yang tinggal dililitkan di pinggang ketika keluar dari kamar mandi.
Saya sempat berprasangka bahwa hal itu adalah akibat dari didikan ibu kita yang menanamkan banyak peraturan pada waktu kita kecil. Tapi hal yang tidak terduga terjadi pada waktu gejala yang sama terlihat pada anak perempuan saya yang baru berumur 2 tahun. “Papa, spreinya ngga ada, spreinya mana?” Awalnya saya kira dia hanya tidak suka ketika melihat kasurnya belum dipasang sprei baru. Beberapa saat kemudian ketika dia masuk ke kamar kerja saya “Iih, berantakan! Papa ayo beresin!” Nah lho, apakah hal ini bersifat genetik?
Situasi kalau mau tidurpun harus sesuai dengan aturan dia, saya harus tidur di sebelah kanannya dan ibunya harus tidur di sebelah kiri. Kalau tidak, dia tidak akan mau tidur dan tetap ngotot sampai kami pindah posisi.
Peraturan makan juga cukup berbeda antara laki-laki dan perempuan. Perjamuan makan malam yang lengkap sebenarnya tidak ada dalam kamus kami. Urutan yang terdiri dari hidangan pembuka, makanan utama dan hidangan penutup dengan beberapa detil minuman dan makanan lain di tengahnya seharusnya dirubah menjadi makan sekenyangnya (dengan urutan yang tak perlu diatur), minum, dan bengong karena kekenyangan. Prinsip dasar kami adalah vini, vidi, vici! (hmm... maybe that's why we don't like foreplay, hahahaha)

Jalan...

jalan....
apakah tugas kita adalah bikin jalan atau memilih jalan?
menuju kemana jalannya?
seharusnya sih ke depan
karena tidak ada orang yang mau mundur toh?
beberapa orang memilih untuk diam di tempat
karena jalan yg dia buat (atau dibuatkan?) sudah terasa nyaman
ada juga yang sibuk melihat jalan di belakangnya, kenapa ngga mulus ya?
ataukah cuma perasaanku saja yang merasa jalannya ngga mulus?
siapa yang menilai jalan yg sudah dibuat itu bagus atau tidak?
mungkin pertanyaan yang lebih tepat adalah kapan
karena biasanya kalau kita sudah berjalan cukup jauh
otomatis kita akan nengok ke belakang dan evaluasi
tapi hati2 kalau melihat ke belakang, nanti tersandung lho
karena maju itu (seharusnya) ke depan toh?
apakah akan sampe ke tujuan? entahlah
karena tugas kita hanyalah bikin jalan (atau memilih jalan) dan berjalan di atasnya



tapi....
apapun jalannya.....
yang penting minumnya doongg.....
hahahahaha...
ANGKAT GELAS JURAGAN!!

Privacy Policy

This privacy policy has been compiled to better serve those who are concerned with how their 'Personally Identifiable Information' (PII) is being used online. PII, as described in US privacy law and information security, is information that can be used on its own or with other information to identify, contact, or locate a single person, or to identify an individual in context. Please read our privacy policy carefully to get a clear understanding of how we collect, use, protect or otherwise handle your Personally Identifiable Information in accordance with our website.

What personal information do we collect from the people that visit our blog, website or app?

When ordering or registering on our site, as appropriate, you may be asked to enter your Google Account or other details to help you with your experience.

When do we collect information?

We collect information from you when you or enter information on our site.

Install 

How do we use your information?

We may use the information we collect from you when you register, make a purchase, sign up for our newsletter, respond to a survey or marketing communication, surf the website, or use certain other site features in the following ways:

      • To ask for ratings and reviews of services or products

How do we protect your information?

We do not use vulnerability scanning and/or scanning to PCI standards.

We only provide articles and information. We never ask for credit card numbers.

We use regular Malware Scanning.

We do not use an SSL certificate

      • We only provide articles and information. We never ask for personal or private information like names, email addresses, or credit card numbers.

Do we use 'cookies'?

We do not use cookies for tracking purposes

You can choose to have your computer warn you each time a cookie is being sent, or you can choose to turn off all cookies. You do this through your browser settings. Since browser is a little different, look at your browser's Help Menu to learn the correct way to modify your cookies.

If you turn cookies off, some features will be disabled. that make your site experience more efficient and may not function properly.

However, you will still be able to place orders .

Third-party disclosure

We do not sell, trade, or otherwise transfer to outside parties your Personally Identifiable Information unless we provide users with advance notice. This does not include website hosting partners and other parties who assist us in operating our website, conducting our business, or serving our users, so long as those parties agree to keep this information confidential. We may also release information when it's release is appropriate to comply with the law, enforce our site policies, or protect ours or others' rights, property or safety.

However, non-personally identifiable visitor information may be provided to other parties for marketing, advertising, or other uses.

Third-party links

We do not include or offer third-party products or services on our website.

Google

Google's advertising requirements can be summed up by Google's Advertising Principles. They are put in place to provide a positive experience for users. https://support.google.com/adwordspolicy/answer/1316548?hl=en

We use Google AdSense Advertising on our website.

Google, as a third-party vendor, uses cookies to serve ads on our site. Google's use of the DART cookie enables it to serve ads to our users based on previous visits to our site and other sites on the Internet. Users may opt-out of the use of the DART cookie by visiting the Google Ad and Content Network privacy policy.

We have implemented the following:

      • Google Display Network Impression Reporting

We, along with third-party vendors such as Google use first-party cookies (such as the Google Analytics cookies) and third-party cookies (such as the DoubleClick cookie) or other third-party identifiers together to compile data regarding user interactions with ad impressions and other ad service functions as they relate to our website.

Opting out:
Users can set preferences for how Google advertises to you using the Google Ad Settings page. Alternatively, you can opt out by visiting the Network Advertising Initiative Opt Out page or by using the Google Analytics Opt Out Browser add on.

California Online Privacy Protection Act

CalOPPA is the first state law in the nation to require commercial websites and online services to post a privacy policy. The law's reach stretches well beyond California to require any person or company in the United States (and conceivably the world) that operates websites collecting Personally Identifiable Information from California consumers to post a conspicuous privacy policy on its website stating exactly the information being collected and those individuals or companies with whom it is being shared. - See more at: http://consumercal.org/california-online-privacy-protection-act-caloppa/#sthash.0FdRbT51.dpuf

According to CalOPPA, we agree to the following:

Users can visit our site anonymously.

Once this privacy policy is created, we will add a link to it on our home page or as a minimum, on the first significant page after entering our website.

Our Privacy Policy link includes the word 'Privacy' and can easily be found on the page specified above.

You will be notified of any Privacy Policy changes:

      • On our Privacy Policy Page

Can change your personal information:

      • By logging in to your account

How does our site handle Do Not Track signals?

We honor Do Not Track signals and Do Not Track, plant cookies, or use advertising when a Do Not Track (DNT) browser mechanism is in place.

Does our site allow third-party behavioral tracking?

It's also important to note that we do not allow third-party behavioral tracking

COPPA (Children Online Privacy Protection Act)

When it comes to the collection of personal information from children under the age of 13 years old, the Children's Online Privacy Protection Act (COPPA) puts parents in control. The Federal Trade Commission, United States' consumer protection agency, enforces the COPPA Rule, which spells out what operators of websites and online services must do to protect children's privacy and safety online.

We do not specifically market to children under the age of 13 years old.

Fair Information Practices

The Fair Information Practices Principles form the backbone of privacy law in the United States and the concepts they include have played a significant role in the development of data protection laws around the globe. Understanding the Fair Information Practice Principles and how they should be implemented is critical to comply with the various privacy laws that protect personal information.

In order to be in line with Fair Information Practices we will take the following responsive action, should a data breach occur:

We will notify you via email

      • Within 7 business days

We also agree to the Individual Redress Principle which requires that individuals have the right to legally pursue enforceable rights against data collectors and processors who fail to adhere to the law. This principle requires not only that individuals have enforceable rights against data users, but also that individuals have recourse to courts or government agencies to investigate and/or prosecute non-compliance by data processors.

CAN SPAM Act

The CAN-SPAM Act is a law that sets the rules for commercial email, establishes requirements for commercial messages, gives recipients the right to have emails stopped from being sent to them, and spells out tough penalties for violations.

We collect your email address in order to:

      • Send information, respond to inquiries, and/or other requests or questions

      • Send you additional information related to your product and/or service

      • Market to our mailing list or continue to send emails to our clients after the original transaction has occurred.

To be in accordance with CANSPAM, we agree to the following:

      • Not use false or misleading subjects or email addresses.

      • Identify the message as an advertisement in some reasonable way.

      • Include the physical address of our business or site headquarters.

      • Monitor third-party email marketing services for compliance, if one is used.

      • Honor opt-out/unsubscribe requests quickly.

      • Allow users to unsubscribe by using the link at the bottom of each email.

If at any time you would like to unsubscribe from receiving future emails, you can email us at

      • Follow the instructions at the bottom of each email.

and we will promptly remove you from ALL correspondence.

Contacting Us

If there are any questions regarding this privacy policy, you may contact us using the information below.

com.lebahbiru.oriflamekatalog

Jl H Jayadi no 27 B

Jakarta, DKI Jakarta 12310

Indonesia

anakgendut@gmail.com